Last night, I was up late as usual. I found myself looking at pictures trying to get an image that I could use for my desktop background. The current one was already about a month old. While browsing on pics, I found this picture we took about a month or two ago. This was where we bought our very first piece of property. It isn't much to look at but it represents something significant to me.
I got married seven years ago. About a year later we decided to start saving to buy a a piece of land we could call ours. It was a big decision, but make it we did. We were trying to make ends meet and we just had our first child. It was a risk to put our money in an investment that wasn't as liquid as cash in a bank. We managed to get enough to make a down payment and eked our way through the monthly payments. Difficult as it was, we made it. It was a significant achievement for me and my wife.
Four years ago, we were still renting an apartment. We didn't have any savings to build a house on the property because all our money was going to the monthly payments on the property. Luckily, we got a break. Long story short, we managed to borrow money to finish the 1st loan off and start payments on a 2nd property.
Three years ago, we moved in to our new home. This place is not so big, but it is ours. We have 6 years to go on the mortgage but we'll make it. If the way things have gone is any indication, we will make it. We have a great motivation to keep this home. This is where our 2nd child was born. This is where we have managed to build relationships with people who like us have been trying to find the perfect place to start building families. Incidentally, my wife is part of the organizing committee for this year's Halloween Trick-or-Treat. There are even more kids this year than last. My son really enjoyed dressing up last year. He had a great time. Seeing the smile on his face really makes for a great time. This year, maybe the little one could go with us. It feels good to live here.
As I scrolled over the thumbnails, I saw my life pass by in front of me (pun intended). There were many more events in between the ones I just shared, many pictures that told different stories. A lot of up's and down's. Many crying moments over a scrape on the knee, or images of the 1st blooms our orchids had. I saw a few of my son playing in the large sala of the old apartment. Pictures of us as we celebrated birthdays, anniversaries , christenings, weddings, fiestas, house blessings, holidays and what-have-you's.
As I went through them, I couldn't help but feel nostalgic, tired, proud and happy at the same time. We had come such a long way. We had a lot of help doing it . We had both good and bad, but we felt our family's love and support all the way. We have a happy life. And I will say that if I have learned anything in the past few years, happiness should really be spelled "Happyness" - without the "I" .
There are still some who contend that climate change is a natural phase that the Earth is going through. That may be true. But man has in his quest to control his surroundings has hastened it all to a critical point.
For several thousand years mankind has made huge strides in controlling his environment, to the point that it seems nothing is impossible. Farms and cities took the place of nomadic hunting and gathering. Civilizations were built on ever hastening movement. It's said that our ancestors walked land bridges that once connected our continents. Today we bridge those continents with air planes, cruise ships and the internet. All of these advances have come at the cost of the environment. Our cities are burgeoning to a point so far greater than what the land could sustain. It's a far cry from the times when hunter-gatherers would take what they needed to survive then move on, allowing nature time to replenish itself. Our constant need to move people, food and supplies to and from urban centers has caused pollution to the air we breathe. Our need to food alone has made it necessary that we demand more from the earth we till.
Yet, for all the powerful change man has caused, it has all been for his own gain. All is not lost. If man can cause so much damage, he can also help heal it. We only need to act together to help the Earth be a sustainable place to live in. If we conserve our resources and use them wisely, we can slow climate change.
Prior to last weekend's birthday party, my wife was panicking. Our trusty old Canon PowerShot A510
So the choice was to have it checked and repaired or buy a new one. I've sort of convinced my wife to approve of that, in principle. No commitment yet, but at least she has agreed to replacing it. Now comes the tough part. Being the geek that I am, I started browsing around for likely replacements.
My first stop was Canon Philippines. I wanted to stick with Canon, I really liked how they've built their cameras. Before going digital, we had an Olympus film camera. My sister-in-law had a Canon SLR. The comparison couldn't be farther. I had a chance to use it a few times, and boy was I hooked on Canon. Add to that the fact that the Powershot series has diversified over the last few years that the line already includes everything from the most basic point-and-shoots to the more advanced short-of-being-a-DSLR models.
So off I went and found three options at 3 different price points. A basic point-and-shoot for around 8,000 pesos, the successor to the Canon PowerShot A510 priced around 12,000 pesos and the latest cheapest DiG!C4-equipped cam. I would have jumped at a chance to own a more expensive PowerShot SX20IS
So the three models I was choosing from were the PowerShot A480 10 MP with 3.3x Optical Zoom
Each of the three have their unique advantages. The PowerShot A480PowerShot has the best price, listed around US$100 in most online stores. And at 10 MP, has a lot of resolution. The A590IS
' Compared to the 12.1 MP count on the PowerShot A1100IS, you'd be missing a lot. The A1100IS can also take 2 shots per second in continous shooting mode and can take closer macro shots than the A590IS
. It's equipped with the DiG!C4 processor, which should span a few years before it's considered obsolete. But here's the best part. If you look at online retailers, the A1100IS is cheaper than the A590IS. So if I can just get someone I know in the US to buy this for me, then I'd be getting the best camera for our needs. Best price-performance ratio, if you asked me.
The rain. It falls lazily. In big drops as if burdened with its duty to nourish the earth beneath it, unhurried and steady in its pace.
The TV blares out the coverage of Cory Aquino's funeral. Hundreds of thousands poured out into the streets to mourn her passing and to make a political or cultural statement. Political in the sense that they support what she had stood for. Cultural, moreso, in the context that it's ingrained in the Filipino psyche that one should share the grief of a fmily striken with a loss of a loved one.
The rain falls steadily. It nourishes the same earth that will embrace us all when death overcomes our bodies. Theatric, it may seem. Life goes on for those that are left behind. Hope springs eternal that we learn from our mistakes. This nation needs to carry on, lessons learned in tow. The cycle goes on.
A few days ago I did a vanity search on my oldest handle, found by oldest blog and read my oldest posts. I read, and read, and read. Then I felt a pang of pain. What I wrote back then was purposeful prose. It had meaning. It had a style. It had flashes of brilliance, moments of idiocy and elegance in the choice of words. It wasn't the best, but it had a unique personality that begged the reader to read on. I felt bad because I no longer wrote that way. Come to think of it, I no longer blog that much. It felt bad to realize that I may have lost something special.
That thought has kept me awake the last 2 nights. I used to write thoughtful, purposeful prose. I used to rush to a computer when a sudden trail of thought hit me and an urge to write it down was eagerly gnawing at me. I turned to blogging because it was easier than writing it all in paper. It was also a lot more practical than Doogie Howser's diary because blogs published themselves. I turned to blogging because there was a community around it, fellow bloggers who either liked or disliked your work. Who either linked to you or criticized you. Who commented with their dissent or encouragement. Now I find the provoking ideas rare and few in between. I find the bloggers, whose blogs I used to blog-hop to, have moved on to twitter and facebook. I too have moved on to twitter and facebook. They are easier to use, require less time to maintain. I have too many things to do all at once. They suit my ever shortening attention span.
As I spend more time on twitter and facebook, I've lost something. I have lost the patience it takes to write a thoughtful, meaningful, purposeful post; something longer than 140 characters with words that provoke minds to subtle agreement or violent objection.
My words, I need them back. I must have them back. Every writer struggles to find the right words to best say what they feel, think and experience. I have lost my words and I want them back.
I've been so busy with work, I had to let go of some things I used to do. It's been almost a year since this blog was even updated. Several of my HowTo blog articles/projects have been put on indefinite hold. I haven't updated several of my personal email accounts. I haven't touched a new linux distro or new version of my old favorites in months. I haven't gone to the old IRC channels I used to frequent. It's truly been more than a while.
The last two days have me hoping I can get back to the things I love doing. Yesterday I ran several 15-minute training sessions with my team members. I also launched a personal project, using on online quiz to get my team calibrated. Earlier today I attended a technical training and enjoyed it. I was chatting with one of the trainers during the break. He was really with me when I said I love the technology,but hate the fact that our jobs weren't really about tech or helping people cope with tech but about client policy. Although he agreed about loving tech, he did counter with, "and that's why I moved to training!"
So now, 2 hours later I am typing this. Awake, mind churning with random ideas and surreal thoughts, I am hopeful still. Hopeful I will have better days. Hopeful these stressful days will ease soon. Hopeful I will be instrumental in making a difference in the lives of those I come across, be it online or in the real world. It's been a while since I hoped. It's been a while...
I'm backing up pictures I uploaded online, the service hosting them is closing down this December. i was actually putting this off for a couple of weeks now, but have heard horror stories about difficulties downloading the files there. I have the choice to move everything to another photo-sharing service but that other one doesn't have the option to download the pictures anymore. You can them print it, but goodluck getting your own pictures back from them.
I'm in a sort of panic right now, I own those pictures and I can't download all the pics in one big lump. Otherwise, I would have left the computer on and have the download complete itself. But no, I have to download the pics an album at a time, which means I have to be here in front of the PC to select the next batch of pics that need to be downloaded. It's painstakingly tedious to do this. And the only time I do have time to do this would be during the weekend, and even then I have to do some errands.
I am doing this though because I want to preserve these pictures. Earlier, I felt a kind to longing for the past - the people I've met, the good times we've had, the memories we've made together I wonder if they still remember me. I miss the fun we had. I miss the good old days when we nary had a care. How powerful a media images are to stoke the idle human mind into longing.
That's why I'm sitting here, butt-aching and bored out of my wits, watching the download progress of each batch of pictures. I'll have to do this again for another set of backed up files next week. The free online back-up drive that I use is also folding up and I need those files. Every other service I've used for years seems to be going out of business. It's like the dot-com bubble all over again. So for the next couple of weekends at least, I'll be sitting whole days in-front of a PC. All for memories all but gone, except for those in my mind and reminders in these images.
It's amazing the amount of comment spam sites receive. I mean, you open yourself up to readers of your blog or site and you expose yourself to bots plying the web to check what forms they could post ads on. It's not comforting either that its so common to see one URL being posted over and over again by different spam bots. It just means that spammers are out to get us. Good thing I've got comment moderation turned on on my blog. Otherwise legit readers would be bothered by the sheer volume
The last time I was in a Starbucks was over 2 years ago. I met up with my friend Lany. This was in the Starbucks in Hacienda Luisita, Tarlac City. So having half an hour to spare after going to the Smart Wireless Center over at SM City Clark, I swung by Starbucks to get a Grande. They recently opened shop there. After waiting for my turn, I impatiently ordered a Cafe Mocha with an extra shot of espresso. It cost more then I spend a week in fare. Well, not really. But that is what I spend in a week when I try to save a little on tricycle fare by walking to where the jeeps ply.
Anyway, I splurged but enjoyed it. I miss the smell of coffee being forced out by slow powerful jets of hot water. I miss the cozy environs of the modern coffee shop sofa and armchair. I miss the act of ordering a complicated combination of options and having the full attention of the barrista as you dictate your demands. I miss having my name called as my order is served. What i don't miss is the crowd of hyperactive wide-eyed pretentious college kids sitting on the outdoor tables, drinking their fraps, smoking their cigs, trying to look "cool" or so. So after I got my order, I walked leisurely around SM Clark, Grande in hand.
It seems that I keep going on a recurring cycle every now and then. I post sporadically often for a few weeks then suddenly go quiet.
Well, there's a reason. As most day jobs go, there are times that you really have to really work hard to get the results you want. It's been a busy 2 weeks for me, not because of added work, but because of tensions in the office.
Recently, our operations manager decided to give us extra tasks. We're now doing more QC (quality check) work on the work output that our agents do. Mostly its boring work, pulling long hours reviewing stuff. It's worthwhile work, though. We see where our guys could use some help or areas we could help them improve.
Then there's the part where you have to deal with people. We (collectively, me and my supervisors) have had to deal with really difficult people in the past month. A lot of fear mongering and whining has been going on and we can't really give them all the information we have. Speaking for myself, I come across a lot of information that explains why things are happening. But I am duty-bound not to disclose that to people who do not need to know. I can only share what I am allowed to speak about. Ironically, some of the higher up's are surprised that I sometimes get information earlier than they do. I have a secret weapon in my arsenal, and it's called Google-Fu ;-) Hehehe.
Anyway, tonight I'm staying home. My schedule got changed to 11 am instead of the night shift. I got a call yesterday morning from one of my supervisors asking if I could adjust my schedule to cover for another sup who was supposed to be working today. She filed for vacation time and was going to be out for the whole weekend. I said yes without hesitation. Tonight, before leaving the office, I talked to our shift manager and he told me he was in the office when my super called. He mentioned my super was all praises for me because I was always ready to take one for the team. That was in direct comparison to one other person in the team who always weaseled out of any schedule changes that didn't happen to suit his personal preferences. Hehehe - score one for me, yaay!
Now enough about work. I have been able to update my blogs here and there. Minor stuff, but it's coming along. Adding the Paypal Donate button on each of my blogs was the most major one. I also plan to do some more reviews for my tech blog. I haven't done those in a while and from the looks of my hits, it appears most of my Google clicks are coming from the last few reviews I did. I need to do some more of that. I'm actually lining up a mini-reviews of Puppy Linux, TinyMe 2008 and DreamLinux. And since I have old hardware that would make for interesting tinkering, I'm going to do a Part II of of my Vector Linux mini-review but focusing on how it will perform on a barely running Pentium II -266 MHz machine.
Now, to find time to do that...
